Save social phobia? These two beliefs are stumbling blocks to interpersonal problems

Save social phobia? These two beliefs are stumbling blocks to interpersonal problems

Relationships,Interpersonal skills,Interpersonal problems,Social phobia,Lingye International Education College,Huang Pengjun

Social,Many people's Achilles Heel。Are you a stage,Nervous to speak? More than one person can not be free? Not take the initiative to make friends? The party occasions,Fear of becoming the focus of the crowd? In fact, this kind of "social phobia.",In many cases relationships with "attitude" about,Over time it becomes restrictive beliefs,Has a significant impact on interpersonal relationships。

Many people think they are born with "social phobia.",But in fact just the use of faith to think about the people I relations,The two most common heart restrictive beliefs are:

Belief in a restrictive relationship problems:Everybody pay attention to me

In relationships,The face of social or public,Will feel intense fear or anxiety of people,Many everyone is limited by the inherent belief,So that excessive anxiety in social situations,Express themselves unable to relax,From time to time afraid of embarrassing behavior will embarrass or,And believe that others often pay attention to his performance。Especially when he senses the performance is not as expected,Everyone will speculate certainly aware of their shortcomings。

Restrictive faith relationship problems two:This time I'll make a fool,They'll think I'm useless、inability

People are often unreasonable performance for their negative thoughts,Often think that they can know the future,Expect the worst will happen,Or think they know what others are thinking,Then my heart that others will surely make a negative evaluation of their own。Once the negative expectations come true,They make themselves more back in social situations、fear,So that the self-confidence of bankruptcy。

Relationships,Interpersonal skills,Interpersonal problems,Social phobia,Lingye International Education College,Huang Pengjun
Recognize your fears / Figure:123RF

How to break through limiting beliefs?

In interpersonal problems,Limiting belief is a terrible obstacle,Not be able to build relationships with people。Lingye International Education CollegefounderHuang PengjunShow,"A lot of people want to be successful,Willpower alone,It will be very hard,You must have environmental,Encourage each other,Because the environment is always greater than the individual will。」

Interpersonal touched by faith,Like an iceberg,Only through self-exploration,According chance to see the underlying psychological subtle,Well-known writer Byron. Kai Didi (Byron Katie) His books "of an idea turn" (Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life) To help the reader switched,Eliminate the negative state of mind。

Relationships,Interpersonal skills,Interpersonal problems,Social phobia,Lingye International Education College,Huang Pengjun
Answer for yourself with question and answer / Figure:123RF

Ask yourself these four sentences,Let the mind automatically answer

Only four questioning,Byron. Katie teaches us a whole new look at all vexed question:

first question:is this real?

second question:I really know this is true?

The third question:When I've been holding this idea,What do I get?

The fourth question:If I do not have this idea,I'll be the kind of person?

He switched demonstration:I think we do not like me。first question:is this real? (my thoughts:I think that "we do not like me.",is this real? ) Calm your mind、Wait a while、Let the mind to answer。second question:Do I really know this is true? (my thoughts:Does everyone really dislike me? )one more time,think carefully:Do I really know the truth about anything? Third question:What will I get when I keep holding this idea? (my thoughts:When I think that he should love me,How would I treat him? How would I do? E.g:Give everyone a bad face? Alone? ) Now close your eyes,We do not like my meditation,And you respond to him a "dirty look" or a loner。If you do,how do you feel? Is it possible to keep the belief that "everyone does not like me" without suffering? If it will be painful,Which parts of the body uncomfortable reaction? Let this issue stays for a while in my heart。The fourth question:If I do not have this idea,What kind of person would I be? (my thoughts:If there is no "we do not like me." The idea,What will happen to me? ) Meditate you in front of an imaginary enemy、In front of people that do not like you。Now imagine looking at that person and,Drop "He should be like you," the idea,Let yourself be quiet,what did you see? Is not there was a calm and peaceful feeling welled up in the hearts warm。

Remain aware incredulous voice in his head

Ling industry - social phobia - stay aware
Restrictive beliefs can be escaped through constant awareness / Figure:123RF

In relationships,Common limiting beliefs,It is "everyone pay attention to me."、"This time I will be a fool."、"They'll think I'm useless and incompetent."、"We do not like me," etc.,In fact, these limiting beliefs,Are not withstand viewing,As long as people once believed it,Will get stuck;in contrast,If we can brave talk back to it、It challenges,The more it has no influence on the people。Through self-awareness,Self-limiting beliefs help from the clutches of,Let inherent fear no longer be shackled,Easy to have a good relationships。