Save social phobia? These two beliefs are a stumbling block to interpersonal problems

Save social phobia? These two beliefs are a stumbling block to interpersonal problems

Relationships,Interpersonal skills,人際關係問題,Social phobia,Lingye International Education College,Huang Pengjun

Social,Many people's Achilles Heel。Are you a stage,Nervous to speak? More than one person can not be free? Not take the initiative to make friends? The party occasions,Fear of becoming the focus of the crowd? In fact, this kind of "social phobia.",In many cases relationships with "attitude" about,Over time it becomes restrictive beliefs,Has a significant impact on interpersonal relationships。

Many people think they are born with "social phobia.",But in fact just the use of faith to think about the people I relations,The two most common heart restrictive beliefs are:

Belief in a restrictive relationship problems:Everybody pay attention to me

In relationships,The face of social or public,Will feel intense fear or anxiety of people,Many everyone is limited by the inherent belief,So that excessive anxiety in social situations,Express themselves unable to relax,From time to time afraid of embarrassing behavior will embarrass or,And believe that others often pay attention to his performance。Especially when he senses the performance is not as expected,Everyone will speculate certainly aware of their shortcomings。

Restrictive faith relationship problems two:This time I'll make a fool,They'll think I'm useless、inability

People are often unreasonable performance for their negative thoughts,Often think that they can know the future,Expect the worst will happen,Or think they know what others are thinking,Then my heart that others will surely make a negative evaluation of their own。Once the negative expectations come true,They make themselves more back in social situations、fear,So that the self-confidence of bankruptcy。

Relationships,Interpersonal skills,人際關係問題,Social phobia,Lingye International Education College,Huang Pengjun
認識自己的恐懼 / Map:123RF

How to break through limiting beliefs?

In interpersonal problems,Limiting belief is a terrible obstacle,Not be able to build relationships with people。Lingye International Education CollegefounderHuang PengjunShow,"A lot of people want to be successful,Willpower alone,It will be very hard,You must have environmental,Encourage each other,Because the environment is always greater than the individual will。」

Interpersonal touched by faith,Like an iceberg,Only through self-exploration,According chance to see the underlying psychological subtle,Well-known writer Byron. Kai Didi (Byron Katie) His books "of an idea turn" (Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life) To help the reader switched,Eliminate the negative state of mind。

Relationships,Interpersonal skills,人際關係問題,Social phobia,Lingye International Education College,Huang Pengjun
用問答的方式替自己解答 / Map:123RF

Ask yourself these four sentences,Let the mind automatically answer

Only four questioning,Byron. Katie teaches us a whole new look at all vexed question:

first question:is this real?

second question:I really know this is true?

The third question:When I've been holding this idea,What do I get?

The fourth question:If I do not have this idea,I'll be the kind of person?

He switched demonstration:I think we do not like me。first question:這是真的嗎?(我的想法:I think that "we do not like me.",這是真的嗎?)讓你的心安靜下來、Wait a while、Let the mind to answer。second question:我真的知道這是真的嗎?(我的想法大家真的都不喜歡我嗎?)再一次,think carefully:我真的知道任何事情的真相嗎?第三個問題當我一直持有這個想法我會得到什麼?(我的想法:When I think that he should love me,How would I treat him? How would I do? E.g:給大家一個臭臉?獨來獨往?)現在閉上你的眼睛,We do not like my meditation,And you respond to him a "dirty look" or a loner。If you do,你感覺如何?是否能保有此信念「大家都不喜歡我」而不痛苦呢?若會痛苦,Which parts of the body uncomfortable reaction? Let this issue stays for a while in my heart。The fourth question:If I do not have this idea,我會是怎樣的人?(我的想法:If there is no "we do not like me." The idea,我的情況會怎麼樣?)冥想你在假想敵面前、In front of people that do not like you。Now imagine looking at that person and,Drop "He should be like you," the idea,Let yourself be quiet,what did you see? Is not there was a calm and peaceful feeling welled up in the hearts warm。

Remain aware incredulous voice in his head

Ling industry - social phobia - stay aware
限制性信念可透過不斷的覺察跳脫 / Map:123RF

In relationships,Common limiting beliefs,Is "everyone pay attention to me."、"This time I will be a fool."、"They'll think I'm useless and incompetent."、"We do not like me," etc.,In fact, these limiting beliefs,Are not withstand viewing,As long as people once believed it,Will get stuck;in contrast,If we can brave talk back to it、It challenges,The more it has no influence on the people。Through self-awareness,Self-limiting beliefs help from the clutches of,Let inherent fear no longer be shackled,Easy to have a good relationships。